“What the hell are you doing here?“, I asked myself, still under the anxiety attack. Her younger sister was sitting next to me while Sukhwinder Singh was singing some crap at top of his lung on the TV. She continued watching and giggled in between. I could tell she liked me. Knowingly or unknowingly I was here, in her home. Looking at the TV set which resembled much like the one we have at home. Some 15-20 year old box. I ignored the mellow drama that was on.
While on one side I was attempting to calm myself down and behave in a sane way, she was constantly asking me if I would like to have tea or Coffee. “Calm down dude!“, I was telling myself while I also simultaneously replied “No” to all her questions. Kind of she was interrupting my “be normal” routine. And it was just getting worst. I couldn’t believe my brain had stopped thinking. I was on an autopilot to behave like an ass. As of what I remember I was talking fast, crap and had answer for everything, every silly thing. Perhaps I am sure her sister thinks of me as a Psychopath.
She showed me around her house. I was in kitchen with her. Truth be told I just wanted to grab her tight. But considering the fact that I was in literal anxiety and that it might be too soon I chose to put my hands in my jacket’s pockets. Safe. While I was scanning things on an auto pilot (When I am happy I absorb everything. Double critical observation.) she put some Almonds in my hand. I couldn’t say No, kind of were forced on me, since the jar was closed and I didn’t really couldn’t process what to do with them so I considering chewing and dumping them in my stomach. Surprise nutrition is good for the body.
She showed me around the house. Her room, her computer and her WARDROBE! I am not too much into style and fashion but I could tell she had an awesome taste (I already know it in fact. Anything she puts on suits). Well the moron part of my brain was computing how many people you could get dressed with all those dresses. A village perhaps. I am not sure why thoughts like these cross my mind when I have to be most focused and most serious. Besides that, while she continued talking (none of which I remember, moving lips are all I saw) my gaze was locked on a soft-toy on her bed. It was a blue fish. She use to tell me about that back in time (once upon a time). She was happy and may be excited (since I was excited and under anxiety I don’t really remember to 100% accuracy). I could see she was smiling, giggling at times and yet other times just pure plain HAPPY. It was great.
It was raining outside. Sukhwinder Singh on TV continued his thing. I can’t fully recall but I think Mikka Singh was also doing some singing with his eye gears on, on the dark stage. “What the hell dude“, I heard a voice from one of the parallel universes in my head. I had become super conscious and I was sure, when I walked out I would have left an image of a Psycho. It’s a thing with me, messing up when you are not supposed to. Her little sister was confirming me being an awkward guy.
What worried me most was I could have accidental pulled her elder sister and the little girl would have not understood what had just happened in front of her eyes. I went and sat on the sofa instead. In one of the parallel universes I had done the grabbing part. Calmed my self and waited for her (the elder one. Sorry for to many “Her” here.) to get a plastic cover for my laptop. I wanted to leave in spite the fact it was raining. I put my laptop in it’s raincoat (the bag which she gave me) and started to rush out. She rushed along with me. Wanted to accompany me to where my bike was parked.
I don’t remember what happened next in detail. I was trying to avoid the water from getting into my shoes and simultaneously her hair (which by the way can distort the line of thinking of anyone in and around a radius of 2m minimum) distracted me. Looked like bunch of noodles (silky ones). I wanted to grab them and take home. We walked under the same umbrella. Her hair now were closely attacking me. While half of my trouser and shoes were all wet. Being under umbrella sounded stupid but then the attacking hair, I didn’t want to miss that. I spoke some crap and what she spoke I couldn’t understand. All the while either I was laughing or she was. It was crazy, stupid but fun.
I hopped onto my bike. Bid her good bye and headed back home. It was still raining. Some five or so odd minutes later I realized what all had happened. I looked at the sky and started to laugh aloud. Good her parents were not at home. If they saw me in the psycho mode. It was GAME OVER!